Saturday, December 5, 2009

Power On - SNOW!

Happy Feast Day of Saint Nick to all!
Jolly old Santa has outdone himself this year and delivered a wonderment of winter white. That's right. It has snowed in Mississippi! I've capture the moment on video for all to enjoy, so enjoy!


A veritable blizzard strikes the sleep town of Hattiesburg, MS. A pounding one-and-a-half inches of snow on the ground! Call the National Guard! It rarely snows in Mississippi, and when it does, people go crazy: Snowmanicide, yellow snowcones, drive-by snowings, Snowmaniflia, MADNESS! Throwing all continuity to the wind, BEANiE and KB brave the elements and the possible loss of their limbs to document this momentous occasion. Will they, too, lose their minds? Journey with them as they face the Blizzard of '09.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Power On - Episode 2 "Assassin's Creed II: Master Assassin Editon"


BEANiE returns to find that Francis is still playing dragon age origins. But BEANiE has a surprise, he's just returned from the videogame store with a large package. What could it be? He's going to tell you.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

KB's Muzak Corner


KB returns to his room to find Francis listening to his ipod. Francis then insults KB's taste in music. This inspires KB to make his own show to show Francis he knows his stuff.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Friday the 13th!

Happy Friday the 13th all!

As you know today is supposed to be the most unlucky day of the year! Isn't that awesome! However I tend to find Friday the 13th a quite lucky day in many cases. Like, I will discover something awesome or finish a worthwhile project.

However Sometimes there is just as much good luck as bad.

Today for example: I nearly got violently ill this morning, then I started a "new" job (long story there) But my first assignment was canceled due to certain difficulties. Then I got to watch all 3 Mad Max films on tv! So... pretty even.

But you all know why Friday the 13th is unlucky, right?

Well it has to do with the Crusades and the Knight's Templar. The Templars were a bad bunch and a plot was formed to eradicate all templars. This plan was carried out on Friday the 13th. They were all killed, and that's a quick explanation of why Friday the 13th is so unlucky.

However your Friday the 13th went, I hope all is well.
Good feelings to all!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Dragon Age: Origins



BEANiE is nowhere to be found! But all is not lost. Random Ninja arrives at the request of Francis to perform his first ever video attack! What is up on the block today? A game which needs no introduction. In lieu of having his own actual gameplay footage, he show's what little he could find. Dragon Age: Origins is property of Electronic Arts and Bioware. Video was found from internet sources such as IGN.com. What is the Random Ninja's opinion?

This video can also be found on Random Ninja Attack's Youtube channel.

Higher resolution video is on the youtube channel.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

November 5th

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why the Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t'was his intent
To blow up the King and Parli'ment.
Three-score barrels of powder below
To prove old England's overthrow;
By God's providence he was catch'd
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, let the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!
And what should we do with him? Burn him!

Happy November 5th Everybody! I'm sure you all remember at least the first line of this poem. Fight the power!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Updates!

Random Ninja Attack is now on Twitter!
Follow @random_ninja5

Also Random Ninja Attack is powered by Blip.tv!

Power On episode 2 is coming soon. Can't give an exact date I'm afraid, because right now certain things are taking precedent ahead of filming. But it will be an actual review and not just a spoof.

Some people expressed feelings of confusion after watching it. Episode 1 was a spoof on the thriller movie "Perfect Blue" I guess people who haven't seen the movie wouldn't understand the references. But isn't that why people watch these kinds of reviews? To see things they haven't before. Anywhay...

I hope you guys enjoy future videos.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Upcoming Segments

Happy Day of the Dead, all!

I thought I would just post a list of future projects in the works.

Power On - Episode 2
Let's Play: Shadow of the Colossus
More text reviews
More attacks on stupidity
and so on...

I hope everyone out their has a good week, I'll see you all in the next post.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Power On - Episode 1

First video Review!
Happy Halloween Everybody!



Something goes horribly wrong when Beanie attempts to review a horror movie. Has he been sucked in? What will become of him? Will he get out or will he forever be the prisoner of his tormentor?

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Attack on Horror Games

Also in keeping in with the season, I thought I'd do a review of the genre pertaining to horror video games.

I'll admit that I am not a big fan of Horror games, for a few reasons:
1, they're not scary
2, the story usually sucks
3, the controls are usually overly comlicated
4, what constitutes a "horror" game anywhay?

As I said, I am not a fan of these types of games; therefore, I haven't played many either. Among the ones I have played are some of the Resident Evil(Biohazard) and Silent Hill games. Even Devil May Cry, but I wouldn't really call that horror (even though it deals with demons and junk) But the Resident Evil and Silent Hill games are really the ones that carved out the genre we all know. And lets just say, because of them I'm not a fan of horror games.

In Resident Evil, you play either a male or female S.T.A.R.S. operative (mostly) there has been an outbreak of the T-Virus which causes the deceased to become reanimated and crave to feed on the flesh of the living, and in some cases cause severe mutation. Simple enough. So what's the problem? Well ya see, this game would technically be called an over the shoulder action shooter game because that's what it is. It just so happens that there are zombies and monsters running around. The controls are terrible(which IS the main reason I stopped playing the games) I mean really, I have to press the directional right or left buttons and then the down button to turn around (fully rotate the analogue stick once available) that's utter bull! I want to be able to turn at a moments notice in the direction I need to go. And don't say the technology wasn't there. There were plenty of games around that time that allowed instant direction change. It's a hinderance to have to fully control the turn. When zombies are pouring into the hallway I want to be able to run not pivot slowly while they draw nearer. It doesn't make sense.
Now like I said, I think this game series more accurately belongs in the action genre and not the horror genre. it's not that scary. "Yes it is," you say? Take a closer look. What is really scary about it? Monsters? Non horror games have monsters and its not scary. Zombies? Just think of them as a mass of slow moving targets. They aren't scary, there's just way too many of them. That can go for any action game too. When you're surrounded by dozens of enemies(no matter what kind they are) you get anxious. Then is it the fact that things pop out at you? The classic jump scare. All games nowadays and even back then had moments where something unexpected jumped out at you. Especially action games. You're walking along a path, or through a clearing minding your own business when BAM! monster. Resident evil is just an action game with zombies in the dark.

One of my most anticipated horror games coming out is Saw. Now I haven't played it yet so I can't really include it in this review, but I will say it seems scary from the footage I've seen. If you've seen any of the movies, you know the drill about how it works. You play a person who has to go through Jigsaw's maze of death traps. And at any moment you could to the wrong thing and BAM! dead. It seems to have an uber dark atmosphere like the movies, where you're not entirely sure what is in the shadows. I'm sure there will be some jump scares as well, but it is not an action game. Saw is a puzzle solving game. You must think in order to survive. The problem here is that once you've figured out the puzzle it lessens the replay value of the game. (that's the problem with all puzzle games, but I still play them) I will definitely play this game because its not an action game masking itself as a horror game.

Now that i've talked about the horror game genre, I'd like to illustrate the top 6 of my favorite scary moments out of video games (not just horror games) Carefull there may be spoilers ahead...
#6 Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty - During the final act of the game, Raiden - after being captured and robbed of his gear - must sneak through the Tron-looking facility butt naked. It is then that he begins to receive abnormal codec calls from the Colonel. In these calls, the colonel's voice becomes distorted as if he's mechanical. The calls also range from him giving you mission orders from the previous games, to him talking about being abducted by aliens. But the Scariest moment is the first call. Raiden - butt naked covering his junk - runs up a flight of stairs. And the colonel calls saying, "Raiden, turn the game consol off right now... The mission is a failure, cut the power right now... Don't worry, it's a game. It's a game like usual..."
"You'll ruin your eyes playing so close to the TV..." interjects Rosemary. Now a videogame telling you to turn it off is pretty out there, but think about this. Like me, most people who played this game probably played straight through with no stops(except potty breaks hopefully) and reached this point of the game after about 20 hours, probably between 2:00 and 4:00 in the morning. Running only on adrenaline and the drive to beat the game, they (and me) were extremely exhausted when this was dropped on them. I was terrified. The Colonel, the man guiding me through the game suddenly tells me that I've done something wrong and should turn off the game. And to top that, every now and then his face disappears and you can see his skull. WTF! It terrified me so much that I wont even look at the screen at that part of the game. Now to be fair, this is not as effective a scare when you play it at noon in the bright daylight. You can tell that the designers knew that people would play straight through the first time and reach that point in the still dark of 2:00 am tired and unwary. It still freaks me out tho.
#5 Metal Gear Solid - About halfway through the game you run into the boss character Psycho Mantis. At this point in the game you've already fought 2 bosses, so you're getting a little cocky. Well the game has a surprise for you. Apart from Mantis reading your memory card and moving the shock controller(which I still think is neat) you're not intimidated by his tricks and you're ready for what ever he throws at you. Or are you? The fight begins, you hear Mantis' creepy laugh and BAM! the screen goes black. A word pops on the screen "video" and you think, omg I turned off the game at a crucial point and like mantis said I havn't saved in such a long time! After a moment the screen comes back on and You see that you didn't turn the game off, but something's missing. Where is mantis? He's gone. You just have time to think, "wha't going on here," when BAM! mantis attacks you. That guy is invisible! SOB! After a few minutes of dodging his invisible attacks he reappears. Now it's on! You pull out your trust SOCOM and open fire. Wait. He dodges all of the bullets! What the hell! BAM! screen goes black again. The word video is back, but wait... it doesn't say video it says Hideo. For those of you who don't know (and shame on you for that) Hideo Kojima is the creator of the Metal Gear Franchise. So it is all to mess with the player. It really shoots down your confidence. I was 12 when I played the game for the first time, (again really late at night) it freaked me out beyond belief, now I've beaten the game so many times it doesn't even bother me, but it still remains one of the most terrifying moments of my gaming history.
#4 Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater, Around 2/3 of the way through the game, snake is captured, and tortured, ultimately losing his eye in the process. Afterwards Snake is held in a dingy cell and fed rotten food. I need to take this moment to explain a side aspect of the game. Every time you enter a new area and save the game Paramedic will enlighten you with a synopsis of a movie she's seen (generally science fiction) this will conclude with a witty banter by Snake which annoys paramedic. If you save the game while snake is in the cell, paramedic will tell Snake about dracula, and we find out that snake is afraid of vampires. What's the scary part, you ask? Well, I actually found this by accident. It only happens if you load the saved game from the cell. I had to stop playing because it was dinner time, and my family went out to eat. It had been a few hours since i had played, by the time I started again it was pretty late at night (again 2-3 am) I loaded the game expecting to just escape the cell and continue on my way. I loaded the game whenBAM! I was playing a completely different game. I was no longer snake. I looked more like Dante from Devil May Cry or something similar. I was in a warehouse being attacked by monsters dressed like cops. They were wolfish and large, but I had 2 sword-like weapons and began to tear into them, eventually if you kill enough monsters you transform, your hair becomes white, and instead of swords, you use your bare hands to tear the monsters in half with blood gushing. You also bound around on all fours. You eventually go back to normal. and the screen fades. Snake wakes up in the cell after having a nightmare. I was shocked and terrified when this happened. Now I just think of it as cool, and play that section on purpose.
#3 Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater. Halfway through the game you initiate a boss fight with a sniper called The End. This fight takes place in 3 areas. The End is a terrifyingly good shot, but that's not what makes this moment terrifying. There is no music during the boss fight (there's actiony music in every other boss fight in all of the games) The weather changes from calm and sunny, to a heavy rain, and to fog. The End is perfectly camouflaged to blend into the environment and he could be anywhere just waiting for you to come by so he can shoot you, which he will if you just go running around. And if you think you can wait him out, you're wrong. He doesn't move until either he shoots you or you shoot him. (he does fall alseep tho, which makes it easier for you to move in on him) He also can sneak up behind you. which is the most terrifying. You can only see one direction at a time. Sometimes you need to use First Person Perspective to find him, but that's when he'll sneak up on you. This and his creepy voice echoing through the valley, make The End one of the scariest bad guys in MGS. But like with mantis, once you've gotten through it enough times it means little.
#2 Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater - I know i've got a lot of it here, but seriously the Metal Gear Series is closer to a horror game that resident evil is. After Snake escapes the cell, he has to get across the fortress without equipment, then run through a sewer being chased by dogs. He eventually leaps down a waterfall and gets pulled downstream. He wakes up and all of the trees surrounding the river are ablaze. Freaky, but not scary yet. It begins to rain, which puts out the fire, and your next boss emerges. He is levitating (which isn't really scary considering the amount of levitating/flying bosses in MGS) He also has a creepy voice(but a great one) This boss is the Sorrow, at this point in the game he has popped in and out on several occasions, and it seems that Snake is the only one who can see him. One the boss fight starts. I know you're expecting me to say BAm again, well not this time. The boss fight eases to its start. It is pouring down rain, snake is waist deep in water, and The Sorrow is floating around infront of you. But wait. The Sorrow has no health. I can totally take this guy. I fire the only gun I have after the escape which is a Single Action Army Colt. But nothing happens, The Sorrow is immune to bullets, what Kind of fight is this? Are you serious? I can't kill this guy? so I walk forward and he floats back, I'm thinking that maybe I can punch him. You can! but again it doesn't kill him. He disappears and reappears further away from you. Slowly as you progress down/up the river (immersed in creepy music) you begin to notice ghostly soldiers approach you. They're slow, kind of like zombies, but unlike zombies, these are ghosts and cannont be killed again. After a short while you realize that these are every soldier you've killed up till this point. And I mean EVERY. Depending on how many people you kill, the time of this segment is longer or shorter. If you havn't killed anyone, only the bosses appear, but if you're like me back then, you killed every hapless person who crossed your path and you had to spend upwards of 15-20 minutes wading through the vengeful spirits. And they do hurt you if you touch them. After you finally get past the hundreds of dead and the bosses, you're finally alone with Sorrow. Now I can finally hurt him right? I'll just calmly walk up to him... BAM! I died?! how did I die? did I do something wrong? How am I supposed to beat someone who can't be hurt by bullets and can't touch? You don't. That's right, this is an unwinable fight. If you cycle through you're inventory at the game over screen, you realize that you're not dead, you're fake dead. Which is something else I'll have to explain. See in the game, Snake has pills that send him into a state of apparent death. this fools the enemy into thinking you're really dead, and they leave you alone. To revive yourself, you have a pill that does that also. You can use it once you die in the river. Now as with quite a few of the other moments on this list, I reached this point of the game really late at night, while I was tired. But even still, facing the spirits of every person you killed in the game as a "boss fight" is frightening.
and now the #1 scary moment in my gaming history... Shadow Of The Colossus. Just Shadow Of The Colossus. The whole game is terrifying. Ok the premise of the game is that you're character brings his beloved to a sacred shrine to bring her back to life. In order to do this you must fight 16 colossi that are hidden throughout the land. And The area of land that you have to search rivals that of San Andreas and Mercenaries. You are all alone except for your trusty horse. All you have is a mystical sword that lights your path, and you are sent out into this vast expanse of changing landscape (featuring everything from beach, to forest, to desert) in search for the 16 Colossi.At first you think yeah, I can do this, no problem. But then after a while into your journey, the vast emptiness and ocasional entrance of the quite creepy music begin to make you think that at any moment something horrible is about to spring out and eat your lunch. I'm going to be very clear on this point - the only monsters you have to fight are the colossi, there are no other enemies in this game. But the mood it sets really scares you. And there is a reason that the monsters are called colossi. Apart from a couple that are roughly the size of small elephants, most range in size from 3-5 story buildings, to battle ships and planes, and they only get larger from their. the final four as I like to call them are the largest monsters I've ever seen in a game(tho I av not played resistance 2 nor lost planet 2, but the final colossus is still larger than the laviathon and the massive akrid shown in the trailers) but it is still the mood and the fact that you don't know when you'll run into the next colossus. (one thing that i dont like in that reguard is that there is only one colossus out and about at a time. I think to make it truly terrifying, they should all be walking around at the same time, it's just you can't get to some as of yet. Shadow of the Colossus is a puzzle solving game, where you have to figure out how to defeat the colossi, but what sets it apart is that, after you kill them, the scene that follows is full of remorsefully toned music and you begin to question whether what you're doing is right. The physical marks become more prominent on your character as well, you grow horns, and you become pale with weird demonic markings all over you. With just the scope of the game and the creative gameplay, as well as the terror mood it immerses you into, This is my number 1 scariest moment in gaming.

I hope you enjoyed that, be on the lookout for the next review. Maybe even a video or 2.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Attack on Horror Movies

What is it about human beings that we constantly desire to be scared out of our wits?
If you don't know what I'm talking about, just listen. Children love to jump out and scare each other; this does not always phase out as they grow older. I know some grown men that still pop around corners flailing their arms and screeching at the top of their lungs. Also, there are amusement parks, water parks, and countless annual fairs featuring rides so jerky and fast that you pee your pants before it starts. Yet we constantly desire to ride them.
One theory is that people enjoy the adrenalin rush from the fear and excitement. Are we insane? We desire to put ourselves in harms way just for a high we get afterwards? Raise your hands; How many of you played chicken? Now, How many of you played chicken on a bicycle? Now, how many of you played chicken on a bicycle against a train? I knew it. A good many of you raised your hands at each question. What is wrong with us? That's right, I said "Us." I've done quite a few reckless and irresponsible things in my day. And that includes taking a bicycle down a bumpy hill while holding sharp implements.

But physical fear is not the only way we can lose our wits, And seeing that it's nearing Halloween, I think its fitting that I talk about one of the most common ways we as human beings scare ourselves. Horror Movies.

Over the last century, horror movies have played a big part in the development of cinema as we know it. But what exactly is a horror movie? According to Wikipedia, "Horror films are movies that strive to elicit the emotions of fear, horror, and terror from viewers. Their plots frequently involve themes of death, the supernatural, or mental illness." Sounds good to me. But we also run into our first problem. Not everyone finds the same things scary. What's frightfully terrifying to one person may only be mildly annoying to someone else.

People are scared of different things. Someone with coulrophobia will be terrified of any thing dealing with clowns, but may not be scared of spiders like the person with arachnophobia. Which is why "phobia" movies don't really do well.

There's your good old-fashioned monster movie, but many of these can just appear cheesy and or not frightening at all. Some of these can even become action movies rather than scary monster movies such as Aliens, Predator, Cloverfield, even Godzilla.

Well there are movies based on horror novels. But many of these are never true to the original works or are just plain not scary. I've never seen a true rendition of Frankenstein that was anywhere close to Mary Shelley's book. Victor Frankenstein was a college student who was experimenting with alchemy not a full-fledged doctor studying scientific research. He didn't make the creature(not monster) in an underground laboratory in his family castle; he made the creature in his upstairs apartment in the city where he was attending college.

Now we come to tragedy movies. They just plain suck.
Moving on.

Haunting movies, whether or not these are based on "true events" does not change the fact that ghost movies are so cliched they're not original anymore. Come on, seriously. A family moves into a haunted house, the children notice things first, it's not until one of the children die or get harmed in some way that the parent/s notice. Things get worse toward the end of act 2, in act 3 we either get help from a priest, voodoo man, or some such thing, but the main character takes it into their own hands and nothing ever really gets solved; either the family moves away and tries to forget what happened, everyone dies, or the ghost go away. Its the same in just about every ghost movie, except a few which I like; The Sixth Sense is one of the most unique ghost movies I've ever seen. But even it, still has elements of the cliches.

Now we come to the most popular "scary" movie subgenre: Slasher/ serial killer movies. Another genre riddled with cliches. Pretty much if you've seen one, you've seen them all. Same concept - a small group/ family are systematically hunted down by one killer, who kills almost all of them, usually there is a heroine (female hero for those who don't know) I don't recall seeing one where there was a hero, unless you count Batman I guess (it follows a similar path, don't believe me? just watch them closely and see the similarities) the heroine will overcome her fear and take down the bad guy after everyone else except maybe one person (either the love interest or best friend) dies. Like I said, if you've seen one slasher flick, you've seen them all. Although there is one movie I've seen that has taken the subgenre and ran with it to an extreme and even points out the "horror" moments to the audience in a clever way. Behind The Mask: The Rise Of Leslie Vernon is awesome in that aspect, and I highly recommend seeing it.

Branching off from the slasher movie subgenre is yet another subbier genre. That is torture horror movies (or torture porn as some critics have called it). Basically the whole movie shows numerous people getting maimed and killed in horrifically graphic ways. These movies are full of gor, nudity, and helpless people who can't do a thing to save themselves because they're scared witless. Personally I don't really mind the gor so much as long as it is done artistically and not just a blood fest. But the thing is, in some of these movies, the victims are actually bad guys, and you end up rooting for them to die. That's messed up isn't it. The movie is justifying the deaths of the people by shoeing us their heinous crimes. So who's really the bad guy; the torturer or the victims? Either way, these movies can sometimes be enjoyable on a different level. One of the best examples is the first Saw movie. It had a dark and complex story that showed how everything was intertwined and connected and how these people are forced to see the error of their ways through torture. The later ones I don't like so much, they've basically made it so everything in all six movies are weaved together and joined, which is neat, but it requires you to remember every detail of all six movies. (I know six isn't out yet, but I guarantee you that it will harken back to at least something from the previous five.

Apart from those, what else is there? Well now we get to my favorite type of horror movie. Psychological horror/thriller movies. I really haven't seen to many good examples in live action movies, but there are some anime movies that really take the cake. I'll describe 2 of them, these happen to be 2 of my all-time favorite movies. The first is the original Ghost In The Shell. It takes place in the not to distant future, where technology has advanced such that people can have there "souls" basically and memories downloaded onto a cybernetic brain and can be put into whatever body they choose. AWESOME! The story centers around a secret police organization that deals with cybernetic terrorism. Criminals can hack into other peoples' bodies and force them to commit crimes. AWESOME! One particularly bad ass hacker is going on a massive crime spree. He calls himself the Puppet Master, and no one knows who he is, not even the american government (who hired him to begin with) AWESOME! The majority of the movie focuses on a hot female cyborg who leads this secret police and her quest to understand herself and her possible connection to the Puppet Master. It's not really a scary movie, but it is full of suspense and anticipation as you follow the cyborg on her journey.
The other movie that is a prime example of psychological thriller is Perfect Blue. This is also an anime movie. The story centers around a former pop star who attempts to form an acting career. Her fans don't take kindly to this and she even gets threatening emails from them. Her manager leads her further down the path of stardom and Mima(the pop star) has to make many compromising choices, including being rape(in a scene for the TV show she's in, not physically) posing nude for a magazine photographer, and being detached almost entirely from her former band. As the movie goes on, someone claiming to be her runs a website and knows exactly what she does everyday(as if someone is stalking her), people involved in these less than modest events wind up dead, and to top that Mima keeps seeing visions of the pop-star her tormenting her and committing the murders, Mima loses her grip on reality and eventually she can't tell the difference between her nightmares and her real life. The climax has such a twist that it'll blow your mind, and the sound track is so dissonent that it ads to the breakdown and you start to wonder which is real and a figment of Mima's imagination.

I highly recommend both movies.

Well there's my attack on horror movies. Many are just re-hashings of cliches and other peoples visions, but there are some that decide to take a step out of conformity and try something fresh. And those are always worth it.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Not Really an Attack... again

Hi all. Random Ninja here again with an all too familiar tale.

Remember a few months ago when I told you the tale of my lost filling and the quest for a DDS? Well, just recently I lost another filling... the SAME filling to be exact! THE SAME FILLING! How is that possible, it has only been a few months and the replacement filling crapped out. I mean what kind of shoddy work was that. I wasn't even eating anything hard or corrosive. It popped out while eating a piece of boneless chicken. BONE-LESS. You know, the soft savoury kind. I was just eating it, la-de-da, minding my own business when, pop, it comes out. Well that sent me into a fit of rage I've not been in for some time.

With the shoddy work from the previous DDS (which shall remain nameless) I opted to instead use my regular dentist back home. Unfortunately I would have to wait a few weeks before I could be "worked" in.

Two Weeks of avoiding getting food and crud in the GAPING HOLE in my tooth. That was fun. But I somehow made it with no problems and was able to see the dentist who promptly stuck that fabulous needle filled with novocaine into my inner cheek. Then he decided to ask me about my career plans and how my life was going. Why is it that dentists decide that it's time for a chat right after they stick you with the numb.

While I was numb, the dentist did what the other one should have done. Re-drill the hole and then refill it. I thought I was done, but it turned out that I had two more cavities that needed tending to. However, they had to be done the next day. Why couldn't they be done right then and there. I mean don't they already have the tools and equipment out? It would've taken another five-ten minutes. Anywhay, I had to go back the next day and get those done.

They were on different sides my mouth, so I got double doses of novocaine. AWESOME!

My face was numb ALL day. So far, the fillings are doing well. Be on the lookout for the first video log, coming soon.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Updates!

Coming soon to Random Ninja Attack:
Vlogs.

I am currently in the process of filming video logs which will be included on this blog and my youtube channel therandomninja5. These videos will be random attacks on things just like my blog posts. I hope you will all enjoy them.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Attack on Stupidity #2

Here I am again with another observation into the world of the stupid.

Today I sat and observed a set of doors for a few hours.
To give you a better Idea of where I was. Think of a patio on the back side of a building with about a dozen tables. There are two double doors that lead into the building. Now this building is closed on sunday. EVERY sunday. This building is on a college campus, and we are half-way through the semester so there should be no excuse for not knowing that this building is closed on sunday. Now to be fair, the entire building is not closed, but the main part is.
In the course of lets say two hours, I witnessed no less than 50 people attempt to gain access to the building. Not all at once of course. Usually they were in small groups. And sometimes the groups would approach frequently.

Let me illustrate the scene... It's mid afternoon and a soft rain is falling. A group of girls approaches the double doors. The try the closest door. It doesn't budge. The accompanying door. Nothing. They pause and sigh a profanity. After a moment they try the other set of double doors. Almost immediately another group of people come walking up, chatting amongst themselves. They try the closest door just after the first group fail to open the second set of doors. More profanity ensues.

Ok they were just going to go through the building, but seriously groups would come one right after the other and try the exact same door as the people before them. and be surprised when even though it didn't open for the other groups, it wouldn't open for them.

But there were people utterly shocked that the building was closed on sunday. Even though it was already established that the building is closed on sunday.

Just for kicks, I propped one of the doors open. Would you believe that everyone tried the closer door rather than the one that appeared to be slightly open. They got mad that the door they went to was locked. Some people looked as if they were going to break the door down by pulling it of the hinges or something. I almost laughed a few times.

A get this. the building in question contains a Chik-fil-A. All Chik-fil-As are closed on sunday. How can you go to one and be surprised when its closed on a sunday.

One person even asked me "why the door won't open."
All I could do was shake my head and say was "It's locked"

Attack On "Mexican" food

I'm sure just about everyone has been to at least one Mexican restaurant in their lives. Or at least has been to a fast-food Mexican restaurant(i.e. Taco Bell, Taco Casa, and any other variety of Taco Huts) I LOVE Mexican Food. But the thing is; the food you get a 90% of these restaurants isn't really mexican food. Mexicans don't only eat tacos, burritos, etc. Mexican food is very flavorful and spicy, but still unique.
Last night I ate at a "Mexican" restaurant. The atmosphere was warm and the air smelled of the delicious aromas I'd expect from that kind of establishment. I got my first notion that this wasn't really a mexican restaurant when I sat down. The waiter was Caucasian. Not that I'm against diversity, but anyway. The chips were covered in the powdered "taco seasoning" that you can buy at grocery stores such as Wal-Mart, Kroger, etc. Ok, I'll accept that. Sometimes, you want to liven up the chips by themselves without the aid of salsa. Then I tried the salsa. It was chock full of the powdered "taco seasoning" as well. Oh, it was awful. Not the worst salsa I've ever eaten, but close. Salsa does not need taco seasoning in it. Where do they get off, putting that crap in salsa. Ok salsa needs very few ingredients to be awesome: tomatoes, peppers, onions, garlic, and cilantro. That's it. do you see "taco seasoning" in there? No you don't. DOn't Put "taco seasoning" in salsa.
You may be wondering why I've put "taco seasoning" in quotes. that's because REAL Tacos don't taste like that. I friggn hate that powdered crap that stores call taco seasoning. Real Mexican food is naturally flavored. True some have a similar taste to "taco seasoning" but that's because of the chili powder. Not all tacos have chili powder. Besides, the real Mexican food is way better anyway. Carne Asada is amazingly good. Its basically thinly sliced steak which is seared with onions. Its simple its delicioso. And it doesn't contain "seasoning"
I ordered a taco plate(cause its a "mexican" restaurant and not a Mexican restaurant) and the meat was so full of that powdered crap I could barely choke it down. The real shame of it all is that your average joe(or jane) will eat this and think, "oh that's what all mexican food should taste like"
I grew up near a Mexican family, and I visited their home for dinner a few times. and the food they prepared could dance circles around the SPAM* served at these "mexican" places.

*Stuff Posing as Mexican

In conclusion, its ok to like mexican food, just remember which is more authentic. (and just having authentic in the title doesn't make it so.)

The sweet tea at this place was kick-ass though.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Attack on "Styles"

Something I've noticed in the recent months: more and more people are starting to wear fedoras. For those of you who don't know, a Fedora is a type of hat which was popular in the late nineteenth and early twentieth century. In pop culture most would associate the fedora with one Henry "Indiana" Jones Junior; or Indy as most of his compatriots call him; Other than old men and famous movie characters, most people in the late twentieth century did not wear fedoras. The reason for this has something to do with JFK not wearing a hat at his presidential inauguration. Since then fewer people had worn them, but they were still around. However, recently there has been a major style shift and the fedora has come back. I rejoiced at this since it is my favorite style hat and has been for over twenty years. This shift I'm referring to happened within the last five years, but hadn't really taking hold until just a few months ago.

Until about a year ago, I was the only person around with one. Slowly I saw more and more people wearing them. "Wow!" I thought, "I'm responsible for bringing the Fedora Back!"

My euphoria was shot down almost instantly when I turned on my TV and saw that just about every pop, hip hop stars, and even rock stars wearing them. Oh, well. At least the hat was back in style and not just for old people.

Before this shift, ignorant people would take a look at my hat and assume I was some kind of cowboy or something. Fedoras are NOT the same thing as a cowboy hat. (although in the old west some cowboys did wear them) Nowadays I see the very same people wearing them like there the new thing. I've got news for you. Fedoras have been around for over TWO HUNDRED YEARS. But they didn't get popular until the late nineteenth century.

"Wait," you might say, "Why is the random ninja attacking fedoras if he likes them."

Well I'm not attacking fedoras. I'm attacking the people who DON'T know how to wear fedoras.

Fedoras don't go with everything. (depending on the color and type) Yet people seem to think they do. Fedoras come in a variety of styles from the wide brimmed (cowboyhat looking) to the inch brimmed also called a Porkpie. No matter the size, fedoras go best with long sleeved button up shirts. They don't go with T-shirts (unless the colors match perfectly, but still best not to even try it) both slacks and jeans work( if they're styler jeans, Fedoras Do Not go with carpenter pants) Sneakers are a no-no(unless they are a solid color and match the hat); boots or other dress type shoes go best. If you wear a T-shirt, wear also a opened button-up shirt, or jacket of some type. Blazers go nicely, and so do sport coats( as well as some others, track suits are a no-no)

For reference as for what is best to wear see: Indiana Jones, Rorschach from Watchmen, Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca.

I like that my favorite hat is back in style, I just wish that it had some style, ya know.

That's all for this attack, be on the lookout for the next one. >.<

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Attack on Video Game Based Movies

Video Games are a popular media and as such some of the most popular franchises have been made into movies. Movies based on other media are quite effective in broadening the fanbase. A good example being comic book based movies. People who don't read comics still go to movies based on them. The same can be said for video game movies; however to a lesser extent. Because, frankly, most video game based movies never hold up to the standards of their original. Now as I previously stated in my Attack on Metal Gear Solid The Novel, if the audience just wanted a word for word copy of the game, they would just play the game, and filmmakers know this, however, sometimes they go too far away from the original to where its not enjoyable to the fans.

Take for instance the Resident Evil Trilogy. While based on the Biohazard (Resident Evil) franchise, the movies actually had little to do with the story of the games. My biggest problem being the first movie. While the filmmakers did incorporate some elements of the game's story (more so with the second and third movie) it didn't really seem like Resident Evil to me. None of the characters of the game were present, almost none of the monsters were present, and it took place in an entirely different location. Granted, the "Hive" is located beneath Raccoon City and the entrance is in the mansion from the game; and granted, it delves into the corruption of the Umbrella Corporation; but as I said, none of the characters appear. The director of the movie explained that the movie is actually a prequel to the game and not a treatment of it, but why? Wouldn't a treatment of the game's story been an awesome movie? Why make a prequel, and introduce characters that are not in any of the games. Plus the movie doesn't show an accurate telling of the outbreak, and it does not show Tyrant - the biggest boss of the game.(not in size mind you - the giant plant takes that - which is also not in the movie) The movie sets up the character of Alice, to be a kick-ass secret Umbrella operative. Ok... Who's Alice? I know she's the main character in all three movies but who is she in the Biohazard franchise? Her character does not appear at all in any of the stories. The second movie is my favorite because it actually delves into the story of the games somewhat. It includes Jill Valentine - one of the main characters from the first game; STARS; and Nemesis! Ok they don't show Tyrant in the first movie, but they have one Nemesis in the second. One thing, there were multiple Nemesi in the game, and another, they weren't impossible to kill - just difficult. It takes place in Raccoon City, and seems like a real zombie movie. The third one is my least favorite for a number of reasons, which are spoilers so I wont discuss them. But one thing is ok about it but should have been in the first one. For those who have seen it, you know what I mean; for those who haven't you'll see. 

Another horror game developed into a movie was Doom. While it was based on the premise of the game, it added in characters whose faults became their downfall. Like most games of its generation, the original game didn't really have a story. It was a first person shooter where you shot at monsters and demons on mars. The movie added a plot and we follow our heroes as they attempt to kill the demons. It was ok, but not great. The coolest thing about this movie is a sequence that harkens back to the old FPS game. 

One video game movie which is ok but not great is the Street Fighter Movie. It had a fairly reasonable story which made sense and wasn't just an hour and a half of fight scenes, which it could have been since that's all the game is. It had almost all of the characters and each were close approximations to how I would imagine them. But really, it was basically a generic action movie with villainous dictators, rough heros, and comic relief where the characters were from Street Fighter. You could have had the exact same movie with the characters having different names and it wouldn't have changed it at all. 

Now we come to a video game movie that took the game and said "listen, you!" It is one that many people have said to be a terrible game based movie, but I actually enjoyed it a lot. I'm talking about Super Mario Bros. I love this movie. Many people would disagree with me. Why? Because its not like the game? Super Mario Bros was a side-scrolling, monster stomping, technicolor, princess saving nightmare. You really want that in your movie? If they were to make a direct movie like that it would be a cheesy children's movie. True, the movie could have been better, with Bowser/Koopa actually being a giant spiky turtle. That would have been awesome, but other than that, I think the movie is one of the better video game movies out there.

My all time favorite video game based movie is of course actually the best video game based movie so far. And that is of course Mortal Kombat. Never has their been a more accurate treatment of a video game on the big screen. So far at least. I'm hoping the ones to come will give it a run for its money. But it had all that it needed and then some. First off, the cast was great, secondly they music made you just want to get up and punch somebody, and third they movie was just awesome. A martial arts tournament with the future of the planet in the balance, intriguing characters, and it all made sense. A video game based movie that expanded on the story and actually made sense! of course it didn't last. 

Now I must discuss the absolute worst video game movie (i've seen) I cringe just thinking about the epic fail that is Mortal Kombat: Annihilation. It was awful. Ok the acting wasn't bad, and the story itself was ok, but come on. It is supposed to take place right after the first one. I mean immediately after. Sonya is all-of-a-sudden a different actress with short hair and a different outfit, Raiden is different, Shao Khan is not all that cool, and Johnny Cage... if you've seen it you know. I do like that they had more characters, but it lacked the punch of the first. It seemed like it tried to thrive on novelty alone, just cramming in as many characters as they could with a story that didn't really make sense in the MK universe. Its been soo long since I've watched it, so it might not be as bad as I remember, but I doubt it.

I know I haven't talked about every video game movie. That's because I haven't seen them all. I actually haven't seen all of Uwe Bol's movies. I've heard from other sources their quality. And don't really want to see them. I will say this though. Why is it so hard to make a good video game movie? The filmmakers probably don't go to the game creators beforehand or during to see if their on track. I can only hope that this changes. I would really like to see a good video game movie in the future. 

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Good Times

 There's a probability that I will be off-line this weekend so I will go ahead an give a holiday message. I hope everyone has a great 4th of July, eats lots of great food, and has fun with all of your friends and family.

I know I will. 

Happy Independence Day, everybody! From your friend the Random Ninja

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Attack on Metal Gear Solid: the Novel

What comes to mind when you hear the title? For most people, they will reminisce about their youth when MGS1 was released on the PlayStation in 1998. It is one of the greatest video games ever made, and one of the greatest franchises in the video game industry selling millions if not billions of copies worldwide, (I'm including all the games here) but what made it so great?


Metal Gear Solid was more than just a game. It took the gaming media and brought it to a new high. For the first time, players were immersed in a world away from reality, yet still keeping realistic themes like love, fear, hatred, and betrayal. It was the first true cinematic game which seemed like the players were part of a movie rather than just a game - a story come to life so to speak, MGS1 was one of the first games to feature full voice overs both in-game and in the cinematics. It also featured a full soundtrack and realistic sound effects (for its time) Like all Metal Gear games, MGS1 pushed the PlayStation's potential to its fullest and even surpassed what was expected of it. Even still today, it is praised for its excellence. Now in it's fourth main console incarnation(not counting the original MSX games from the 80s. The Metal Gear Saga is one of those genre busting games that starts the player off in a familiar stance then throws them off their feet and challenges them to think strategically in order to complete their mission. 


But this is not a review of Metal Gear Solid the game. Which is awesome and would take me forever to write a review up to its high level of gravitas. (possibly in the future)


Like many other widely popular franchises, Metal Gear Solid has had its run with almost every other form of entertainment media including: toys, clothes, radio dramas, graphic novels, and books. Not to mention the in-the-works Metal Gear Solid movie, but I'll touch on that in a later review about video game based movies. In terms of books their have been a few incarnations; mainly fan-written stories with their favorites characters, as well as novelized versions which are verbatum to the VO script to the games, and also unofficial versions of the main plot. However, there is one official written work.


This is my attack of Metal Gear Solid the novel.


Now I know what you're thinking, “It's just our favorite cigarette smoking, bandana wearing protagonist on an adventure that doesn't have anything to do with the regular canon of the games, right?” 


Wrong. While on the outside you may think that, because after all, most video game based novels are just taking place in the same reality with either different characters or different circumstances; but in this case both are wrong. It actually is based on the first game. (by first I mean MGS1. MG and MG2:SS came out a decade earlier and I could do an entire attack on why the novelization of those sucks) But as it is this book MGSTN doesn't suck. It is written by Raymond Benson whom some of you may recognize as David Michaels, the writer of the Tom Clancey's: Splinter Cell books. I have to admit, his style of writing is not my favorite, but he is quite a competent writer and has a grasp on characters which he himself has not created. 


 After picking up the book, the first thing you notice, other than the familiar font used on all of the PS2 metal gears, is the cover image. Its the classic Yoji Shinkawa illustration of Snake with the goggles seen on the title screen of the game. Awesome! Yoji Shinkawa has been the lead artist and character designer of the series since MGS1, its only fitting that his work accompany the novel. It is one way that you can tell that it is an official release. Above the title there is a sentence which reads, “The official novel of the thrilling Konami video game created by Hideo Kojima!” By reading the synopsis on the back cover, you find out that this book is not just a novelization but actually delves into the mythos of the world Solid Snake inhabits, giving insights to the characters and their motivations, as well as a little back story (which helps tie-in the series)


Ok, there is a little hiccup on the back. Complaint #1: on the back of the book it says, “Solid Snake's mission is to breach the heavily fortified base to rescue hostages and to destroy the superweapon.” My problem with this is that; 1: its technically not a base, but a secret government-run nuclear warhead storage and disposal facility, but I'll cut them some slack seeing as that's a mouthful to put on the back cover synopsis; and 2: Snake doesn't know that there is a “superweapon” in the “base.” It's not part of his original mission plan, it only comes up after he finds out about it; but again, I'll give them slack on this because its a catching phrase and the prospective reader may buy more readily if they know there is a “superweapon.”


I'm not going to give spoilers (technically – since it is based on the game) but I will discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly of this novel. Pun intended. 


As I said earlier, the writer gives insights into the characters that was not offered in the game itself, and he shows incidents outside of the game that influenced Snake and the other characters. He does this fairly well. Of course he did have several sources to draw from including: the game, the graphic novel, the development team, and the creator – Mr. Kojima – as well.  


For those of you who have played the game, you will note several differences, many differences in fact that span the entire novel. These differences are not bad mind you, but it does detract from the nostalgia a bit. For those who haven't played the game or are just not familiar with it, this point is moot.

The first being that Snake meets the support team before leaving the sub. Not that this is bad, in fact in all likelyhood, he would have met the team before disembarking. Second; snake already has his SOCOM from the get-go, I actually do have a problem with this. Disregarding that it does make more sense that snake goes in with at least one weapon, in the game you have to out think your enemy while not having any weapons until a little while into the story. Third and most notable is that Snake goes in without his trusty cigs. Really? I mean, he even says that he was thinking of smuggling them in like he does in the game, but doesn't; although Snake does quickly grab some from an enemy which he comments are “terrible.” The author uses this as a recurring bit where Snake keeps complaining about having them instead of his “good” cigarettes. Another thing that fans of the game will note is that the structure of the facility has been altered to make it more convenient for storytelling. Again this really isn't all that terrible in that it does make the story flow better, but again, it loses nostalgia. Some of the fights are different than in the game, but this too makes sense, because a game and a novel flow differently. Its a bit more realistic in that it doesn't take a million bullets to take down the bosses like in games.


One thing I like about this novel is that Snake's inner monologue is shown in one line italicized text. However, halfway through the novel, these already established inner monologues are accompanied by the phrase, “Snake thought.” Why? We already know that these...

Metal Gear!?

...are Snake's thoughts. So why halfway through the book do they start saying “Thought Snake.”


One problem I have with the novel is that certain instances happen before they actually did in the game. Not by much mind you, but I think that these parts of the  story flowed better the way they did in the game. This doesn't happen often but when it does its kind of annoying. Maybe people who haven't played the game wont notice these. Some instances were even left out entirely. All of the scenes were present but, sometimes little treasures were no where to be seen. When you read you'll notice which one's I'm talking about (if you've played the game)


 I will say that the characters were intriguing and captivated me while reading, and it was all a bit more ground in reality that the game itself. As I said with the enemies being more realistic and not taking forever to kill. 


Not all characters were as fleshed out as the others, one of these being Nastasha. Arguably though, you can in fact play through the entire game without actually contacting her. But It would have been nice if her character in the novel was a bit more fleshed out. Another character I feel that didn't get enough “screen time” was Mei Ling. True, she's not a big character in the game either, but she does play her part. She's just another character I feel could have been better developed given the style of writing. If the novel was only following Snake and didn't delve into the other character besides when he actually contacts them it would have been okay to leave her and the other characters not as developed. 


The scenes which were added to the story do actually give more insights to character's and show that they are not just two-dimensional. Particularly one towards the end which I won't spoil for you. Just know that it is heartwarming. 


A few discrepancies in continuity I noticed; 1:The Hind goes after the F-16s just like in the game but there's never any mention of their encounter again in the book. 2: Sometimes there were miscounts on Snake's ammunition (i.e. he used more chaff grenades than he actually had in one scene) 3: Some rooms from the game were combined into one for the book (this is okay in some instances, but in others gets confusing) 4: In one scene a room was actually added and didn't necessarily need to be. (you'll notice it when it comes up if you read the book) 5: (this is actually in the game as well) how does the Ninja get past the electrified floor? 6: Both Miller and Deepthroat tell Snake about things way before they need to (i.e. about weapons Snake needs long before the instance Snake will need them. - I know this makes more sense, but part of the fun of the game was coming to an area you couldn't pass unless you backtracked or went to a different area to obtain the item or items needed to pass.) 7: Snake's hair is black in the novel, yet clearly in the games its brown. 8: (this is more of a problem than a continuity error and may be a spoiler to those who don't know the story) the Hind fight is over way too quickly. 9: How old is Naomi? 10: (this is in the game also) How does Miller know about Octopus when clearly Snake has told no one about it? 11: (almost a spoiler) When Snake's hands are tied, how does he “punch in” the codec frequency? 12: they also don't show his hands being untied, but they are soon after. 13: (in the game too) How does Otacon get past the security hell that Snake must navigate (guards, traps, etc)? I know the explanation Otacon gives in the game and novel, but that still leaves a lot of places that he couldn't possibly get through by those means. 14: (though not really a fault of continuity but still...) conveniently placed items. (you'll notice them) There are actually a few more, but those would contain definite spoilers. If you've played the game, you will definitely notice them. Even if you are an adept reader and are knowledgeable of plot structure you'll notice them. 


Overall I would say this book is pretty good, because if you wanted an exact word-for-word translation of the game, why not just play the game itself. It does read pretty fast, and as I said there are a few minor discrepancies, but those are generally overcome by the great character and overall story. The characters in the novel are true to their pixilated brethren (accept for some minor details which would kind of be spoiling, but are nevertheless close to how those characters would react) It's a fast read and a short read, being just over 300 pages long, but an enjoyable one. I would recommend that if you are a fan of the series, to at least check the book out, and even if you aren't a fan, but would still like to know the story. Especially if you are not a gamer and would like to know the awesome tale of Solid Snake without actually having to play through the game, you should check this book out. It's an affordable price and even cheaper if you buy from the internet.


 I give Metal Gear Solid the novel a 4 out of 5.


Metal Gear Solid the novel is produced by Del Rey and is written by Raymond Benson, with cover art from Yoji Shinkawa and cover design by David Stevenson

Metal Gear Solid, Solid Snake and all other characters and games are property of Konami and Hideo Kojima


It is in the science fiction section of your local bookstore; also try Amazon.com

Metal Gear Solid 2 the novel is due out later this year. You can expect another review from the Random Ninja once it arrives.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Attack on Stupidity #1

This will be the first in a long run of attacks about the stupidity of people in general. I will not get into any specific peoples because really this is not limited to any, in fact, I believe as a species the human race is pretty dim-witted. Even as I'm typing this my neighbor is banging on something - at 1:30 in the morning. But this is not about him and in fact he may have a good reason, plus if I were asleep I might not be annoyed by it. But I digress.

In the building which I live there are a total of 6 ways to exit the building: a front entrance consisting of four doors, a rear entrance, and four emergency exits. These exits are clearly labeled as such reading, "Alarm WILL go off." Yet, the inept mindless drones that inhabit the building refuse to acknowledge this and continually use the emergency exits as regular exits all to shave off probably thirty seconds to leave the building. Off course every time the door opens, the alarm sounds making everyone in the building think there's a fire. Every... Time...

This problem arose a few weeks ago when new tenants moved in - including myself. It occurred quite often and usually at night. There were even signs posted on the doors promising that if one was caught opening the door they would be subject to fine. However, this has had little effect as people still use the emergency exits to leave - most often the one by my door. See the building is set up like a capitol letter H with an elongated bar in the middle. My room is the last room at the end of one of the struts - right next to the E-exit. It annoys the crap out of me that people won't just take the extra 30-60 seconds to go out the front or rear entrance. Even if I'm running late, I go all the way to the front. And for me that is further than most people in the building. 

Stupidity is an infectious desease that should be attacked and snuffed out before it affects the entire world. Unless its too late. Once I build my time machine, that will be changed. I have no qualms about altering the space-time continuum if it betters society at large. 

Be on the lookout for the next RANDOM NINJA ATTACK!!!

Monday, June 29, 2009

Not Really an Attack

A few days ago one of my fillings broke and came out of my tooth. I was really freaking out, because it happened literally over night. There was no warning to this sudden failure of MY FILLING. I was so preoccupied that I couldn't stop thinking about it all day. "Just go to the dentist," you say. Well, its not that simple. I am not familiar with the city I am currently in and had no idea where the dentist was. Plus I had pressing matters which needed to be taken care of that morning, so I would have to wait until that afternoon to begin my search for the dentist.

Once my pressing matters were complete, I was able to begin my quest. First I tried asking people where the dentist was... can you believe almost no one knew, or at least no one knew about one close by. Attention: you are about to witness a yellow book moment. After about an hour of asking around I found one person who had a phonebook and they kindly flipped through the yellow pages to find a nearby affordable DDS. It turns out there are dozens of dentists in this city, and one was fairly near. It took a while to find them though because there is no straight way to get their from my residence. Plus I turned the wrong way a couple of times and then passed them once. 

Anywhay(I like to spell it this way) after a long and arduous journey I dragged myself across the threshold and submitted my plight to the fair maiden who stood sentry at the pearly gates. (get it? Pearly) I was prohibited from going further, for they were booked solid that day. But the fair maiden took pity on me and scheduled me for an appointment at a later date.

I was overjoyed, but now my quest was greatly expanded and revised. I now had to keep the hole in my tooth clean for three days. A difficult task indeed considering I keep emergency twizzlers by my bed and I love TACOS and Mountain Dew. Plus the hole was on my preferred chewing side, so I had to chew on the other side of my mouth. 

I know what you're saying, "what a wimp, its just a hole in his tooth, its not the end of the world" and I would agree with you; however, I did not know the cause of this plus it happened in the night so I probably swallowed my filling, making me sick for a few days.  Those were the longest three days of my life.

Today I went to my appointment and saw the dentist. This time I had no trouble finding the pearly gate and the fair maiden remembered me. But she still could not let me through the gate until I filled out the proper paperwork. Once I did it was just a matter of time. They led me into a yellow room and sat me on a grayish blue chair. I told the - what do you call them? - dentist nurse(for lack of a better term) about the hole in my tooth, she looked in my mouth then x-rayed me( i always enjoy being x-rayed 'cause you get to wear the bulletproof apron)

anywhay, after I waited an hour for the DDS to show, he came in and looked in my mouth also - poking the hole in my tooth with that steel hook of his. A shot of pain ran through my nerves. After prodding it a few more times, he informed me that there was no decay of the tooth and that the filling just popped out(for no apparent reason) I was relieved. I had thought that a cavity had opened up and went beneath my filling and shattered it causing all kinds of hell. But no, everything was fine except for the hole in my tooth. 

The DDS kindly gave me a replacement filling, which required no drilling; so no novacaine nor NO2. (darn) I was hoping to be loopy for the rest of the day. but it was no trouble in filling in the hole. Of course, I forgot to mention, the missing filling was from my top left wisdom tooth. Oh joy. Tubes, hooks, and fingers were jammed as far into my mouth as they possibly could be. It took about five minutes, but now I have a new filling. Yay. 

So that was my quest to get a new filling I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed getting it. Now I just have to wait for that taste to get out of my mouth, and its back there. My REAL ist attack is coming soon, I'm almost finished reading MGS the novel, and my Attack/Review will be up by the end of the week.

Attack #1

Hi all, this is the Random Ninja. I will be starting a new blog that attacks multi-media. Not in a malicious way mind you but an attack none-the-less. Since this is my first blog, I do not yet have anything to attack as of yet, but rest assured that one will be coming soon. I will be both blogging and vlogging about the things that we use for entertainment and escape, including but not limited to: movies, games, comics, books, music, food, clothing, and television. 

If you wish to request something to be Attacked, please contact me and let me know. 

Here's a list of upcoming Attacks in the making:
- Attack on inFamous
- Review of Metal Gear Solid 4 Guns of the Patriots (because I just have to give my opinion)
- Attack on popular fast-food chains
- Review of Metal Gear Solid The Novel
- Coke vs. Pepsi
- Attack on Video Game Based Movies
- Space Ghost The Comic
- Cross-over comic: Hellboy meets Painkiller Jane
- and much more...

As I said, I am willing to Attack anything you all want to see brought down a peg or just for fun. Also I will post the videos on youtube as well, you can view those and other video projects I've done in the past at my channel therandomninja5. I've done AMVs, Short Films, Documentaries, etc. I hope you enjoy my attacks as much as I will enjoy attacking.